Actual Appreciation

OK, for all my whining about teacher appreciation week, I got appreciated today. By one of my former students. He came in when we were in the middle of a test and I said, "Marcel, you're not supposed to be in this building during testing." (Someone suggested using aliases for the kids because it makes the stories easier to remember and more personal, so I'll try that.) He said, "Oh, I just wanted to bring you something." The something was a little stuffed Taco Bell dog that says, "Feliz Navidad, amigos," when you squeeze it. It looks like it's been well loved - I'll put a picture of it up later. I asked him what it was for and he said it was for Teacher's Day! And he's not even my student any more.

Later, the class had a little conversation that also made me feel appreciated. D'Anthony called some girl ugly, and the girl was sad, and I said that if someone were to call me ugly I'd just think to myself, "Well, I know I"m pretty!" and ignore them. The peanut gallery chimed in and it went like this,

"Teacher, you more like beautiful than pretty."

"You more than beautiful."

"You always beautiful."

"You the beautifulest and prettiest teacher I had."

So, sometimes I do feel affirmed here. At least by the kids.

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A Loss

(I have been putting off finishing this blog post for months. You'll see why) Today, I was cleaning a bookshelf and I found the journal from one of my third-grade students, who I call Fred in my book , in 2001. I still had it because he didn't come to the last day of school to get his stuff this year and I guess it got put in a pile and somehow I've kept it with me. He didn't come to the last day of school, probably because his family was a mess: dad in prison, mom in an abusive relationship, all the kids (understandably) acting out violently. Fred was expelled from our school in second grade for hitting a teacher. Then he was expelled from the other school, I don't know why, at the end of second grade. He came back on the condition from the administration that he be in my class because I had him as a student in first grade and he listened to me and worked well with me. We had a really good relationship, although Fred was definitely not easy to have in class.

A New Prison, Part Two

Second very long part of the prison visit report. After we got all the paperwork filled out and went through the metal detector, we got visitation slips with the name of the inmate, and made our way over to the other building for visitation. This is not maximum security so thankfully you can just sit next to the inmates, and not be separated by glass or have to use a telephone to talk. First, you get a gate unlocked and go into a holding pen that is of course in direct sunlight (or rain if it's that season) and surrounded by fences topped with razor wire. You wait there until the gate at the other end is unlocked. This holding pen was a little bigger and less claustrophobic than the other prison (I do not have any claustrophobia and I came very close to a panic attack once at the other place) and they opened the other gate more quickly. Then you walk, again in blazing sunlight (or rain) to the visitation building. This one was less of a walk than the other prison but I still

A New Prison, Part 1

My former student, friend, and co-author was moved to a new prison during COVID. We (myself, Mitali, and his Abuela) have visited a couple of times via the video visit functionality they set up, but we've also been trying to visit in person, ever since in-person visits were allowed again. After four of them being canceled (sometimes we were told why, sometimes not), we finally got a visit. I was super nervous about this visit. (I felt better when Mitali mentioned that she was also, because she is an inherently positive and optimistic person!) I am not proud of this, but there was a large part of me that was hoping that the visit would be canceled, just like the previous four were. I felt a little better when someone I know messaged me privately to tell me that they had had very good experiences visiting a family member in that prison. But I still didn't sleep well at all that night, worrying about the guards, the many things that could go wrong, and the projected 111-degree hea

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