Skip to main content

Connecting

The thing I like the most about teaching is not teaching; it's finding ways to connect with the kids, especially the kids who don't think that teachers have anything in common with them.  It's not that hard - I really do enjoy a lot of different books, movies, music, etc., and I'm very curious, so I've learned about many things even if I don't necessarily enjoy them.

When I assess a new student, the first thing I ask them is what they like.  Of course, there are different ways to do this depending on how old the child is.  If the student is little, I ask them what they like to play and who they like to play with.  If they're older, I might ask them what they like to read or what movies they like to watch.  Sometimes it takes a few questions and sometimes they look at me like I'm saying the dumbest thing they've ever heard... until I get to the question that is something they love. 

With my newest student, it's Harry Potter.  She is 12 years old and she loves Harry Potter.  She told me no, she doesn't like TV, she doesn't like music, she doesn't like sports - and her whole body language was tuned out - and then I got to books and movies.  I told her I've read all the books and she said she's read the first three but after that "they get really long" but she loves the movies and she's going to dress up as Dobby the house-elf and go see the movie at midnight on opening night with her sister and she can't even sleep because she's so excited and...

Excellent.

So, now I have the motivation to get her to write.  She doesn't like to write - oh, but if she can write about her Dobby costume, she'll do it.  She doesn't want to keep a journal.  But if it's a Harry Potter journal, that's a whole different story.  The questions started coming: Can she write about the movie after she sees it?  Can she write about all the different costumes?  [Note to all teachers and parents: if a kid says "Can I write about _____?, the answer is yes.]

Connecting to a kid like this brings a whole different dynamic to the relationship.  It can be hard if you're not used to trying to keep authority , because you don't want to lose that part of the relationship.  But when it's balanced, I think it really builds respect and even makes the student more willing to do what you're asking of him or her. 

It gets a little harder when you really don't have that much in common, but I think even just listening and asking questions about what the student is passionate about goes a long way.  I had one student who was being tutored in Spanish and, it seemed, the only thing he enjoyed in life was comic books, and he was WAY into them.  Giving him two minutes at the end of each session to explain a comic book character to me was all he needed to get motivated.  As a result, I also know more about Batgirl than I ever hoped to.

Three years ago: Separation Forms

Four years ago: Victim of Violence
Labels:

Comments

House Dreams said…
My first experience with creative ways to teach reading was in the 70's when I was student teacher. I was amazed to see one boy reading his baseball cards to the teacher.
2:55 PM
Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

A Loss

  (I have been putting off finishing this blog post for months. You'll see why)  Today, I was cleaning a bookshelf and I found the journal from one of my third-grade students, who I call Fred in my book , in 2001. I still had it because he didn't come to the last day of school to get his stuff this year and I guess it got put in a pile and somehow I've kept it with me.  He didn't come to the last day of school, probably because his family was a mess: dad in prison, mom in an abusive relationship, all the kids (understandably) acting out violently. Fred was expelled from our school in second grade for hitting a teacher. Then he was expelled from the other school, I don't know why, at the end of second grade. He came back on the condition from the administration that he be in my class because I had him as a student in first grade and he listened to me and worked well with me.  We had a really good relationship, although Fred was definitely not easy to have in class....
Post a Comment
Read more

A New Prison, Part Two

  Second very long part of the prison visit report.   After we got all the paperwork filled out and went through the metal detector, we got visitation slips with the name of the inmate, and made our way over to the other building for visitation. This is not maximum security so thankfully you can just sit next to the inmates, and not be separated by glass or have to use a telephone to talk.    First, you get a gate unlocked and go into a holding pen that is of course in direct sunlight (or rain if it's that season) and surrounded by fences topped with razor wire. You wait there until the gate at the other end is unlocked. This holding pen was a little bigger and less claustrophobic than the other prison (I do not have any claustrophobia and I came very close to a panic attack once at the other place) and they opened the other gate more quickly. Then you walk, again in blazing sunlight (or rain) to the visitation building. This one was less of a walk than the other pri...
Post a Comment
Read more

A New Prison, Part 1

My former student, friend, and co-author was moved to a new prison during COVID. We (myself, Mitali, and his Abuela) have visited a couple of times via the video visit functionality they set up, but we've also been trying to visit in person, ever since in-person visits were allowed again. After four of them being canceled (sometimes we were told why, sometimes not), we finally got a visit. I was super nervous about this visit. (I felt better when Mitali mentioned that she was also, because she is an inherently positive and optimistic person!) I am not proud of this, but there was a large part of me that was hoping that the visit would be canceled, just like the previous four were. I felt a little better when someone I know messaged me privately to tell me that they had had very good experiences visiting a family member in that prison. But I still didn't sleep well at all that night, worrying about the guards, the many things that could go wrong, and the projected 111-degree hea...
Post a Comment
Read more