tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21905243.post4031136578474025681..comments2024-01-22T02:23:31.323-08:00Comments on Bronwyn Harris, Author: More Evaluator WoesBronwyn http://www.blogger.com/profile/00665152623001702024noreply@blogger.comBlogger3125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21905243.post-48236955759537832842007-03-09T18:26:00.000-08:002007-03-09T18:26:00.000-08:00Oops one more thing. I almost would just write the...Oops one more thing. I almost would just write the letter as, "The parents of this community and I have a long standing relationship of trust. One reason they respect me is that I speak bluntly about their children in the context of caring deeply about them. This is what they also do, so it's an effective form of communication. I understand that in general using negative labels can hurt a child, so I don't do that. I do not say Timmy is a lazy boy, I say that when Timmy is lazy he doesn't do as well. Since I am labeling the behavior and not the child, your comments seem to me to "sugarcoat" the issues involved. "Sugarcoating" is not well-respected in this community, and so while I appreciate the effort and time you spent in pointing out what you felt to be errors, I believe I have optimally worded my comments so that the children have the best chance of succeeding in the future.<BR/><BR/>Respectfully,<BR/>...Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08270484735583327488noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21905243.post-29868569831835120092007-03-09T18:18:00.000-08:002007-03-09T18:18:00.000-08:00OK, this is my feedback, keeping in mind I'm in th...OK, this is my feedback, keeping in mind I'm in the business world, not the school system world. I recognize they are different but you'll have to "translate" and see if this can be helpful to you somehow.<BR/><BR/>First, let me just agree that this woman is a terrible manager. The very first thing you learn in managing people is that you *ask* them questions about their work, not tell them. The questions might be very loaded, such as "is there some reason why you use language like 'rude' in your evaluation?" but you always ask the question. <BR/><BR/>You do this because as a manager you might learn something surprising, because it's always less demoralizing to be told you've done something wrong if you're at least given a chance to explain your reasoning, and because, if the person is making a mistake, it "sticks better" if they figure this out themselves during the course of further questioning by the manager exploring the issue. (You'd think this would be obvious in an educational setting...!)<BR/><BR/>Anyway.<BR/><BR/>If this were in my workplace (someone who manages me, who is so atrocious that they work against the goal), I would first do as you've done repeatedly and explain why what they suggest will not work. If they say, "do it anyway," I would immediately forward all conversation directly to their boss or equivalent. (An alternative that might me more school system-y might be to consult with a union legal rep, or some other sort of teacher advocate or mentor resource?)<BR/><BR/>You should comment that you would like to call a meeting with the three of you because community relations is such a key component of success and something you've worked very hard to successfully cultivate, and as you're going on a sabbatical next year you're very concerned about the community relationship with the school. <BR/><BR/>You then go into the meeting with the ostensibly noble purpose of helping the manager learn how to do their job. (You are a teacher, I believe you can do this... even when you're angry!)<BR/><BR/>You go into the meeting with your manager and her manager, and talk directly to your manager (not theirs!) and go through their behaviors, and why you believe it won't work out they way they intend, and what you believe will happen instead, and WHY you believe that. It's important that you talk to the manager with respect, because it's important that the manager's manager see you as someone trying to get the job done. <BR/><BR/>That will put the manager's manager in the role of mediator rather than decision-maker, a much better idea because they probably have LESS information than either of you.<BR/><BR/>One of several things typically comes of this, assuming you can get into see the person in the first place:<BR/> - You are offered/requested something to do over your sabbatical that's helpful to the system overall.<BR/> - You are reprimanded for escalating the situation, in which case there's something seriously rotten in Denmark and you need to get out of the system in order to effect any change anyway.<BR/> - Your manager learns something and keeps their job; they either respect your knowledge or respect that you'll go over their head when they don't know what they're doing, so they take more care.<BR/> - Your manager is replaced.<BR/> - The same thing happens again, and you have to do it again.<BR/><BR/>In your case, particularly because you're already planning on going on sabbatical, I'd think it would be the first option.<BR/><BR/>Keep in mind that I'm almost always at the Director level (one up from Manager but below VP), so my point of view is usually the manager's manager one. (Frankly, I don't mind mediating, but I if it's he said / she said, I get irritable, because of course how would I know?) <BR/><BR/>One of the things that inevitably falls out of mediation, though, is who really knows what's going on. This is why I think that if the person you bump this up to has any sense they'll be all about hearing what you have to say.<BR/><BR/>You may need to schedule an hour of yoga before the meeting though... :)Anonymoushttps://www.blogger.com/profile/08270484735583327488noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-21905243.post-57627131918591671062007-03-09T16:38:00.000-08:002007-03-09T16:38:00.000-08:00When my child was diagnosed with ADHD, I thought t...When my child was diagnosed with ADHD, I thought to allow poor work, due ti his problems with concentration.<BR/><BR/>The evaluating Psychiatrist told me "NO! keep the bar HIGH, he will work towards your expectations!"<BR/><BR/>A kid with ADHD called his teacher an idiot and the parent told her, "I appologize. He will face consequences at home for his rudeness, feel free to deal with him as you see fit."<BR/><BR/>Then we have this: <BR/>A teenager with severe ADHD and learning disabilities balked when the lifeguard said to leave the pool; he'd pushed 3 people in. "But I have ADHD and I can't help it!" he shouted to the lifeguard (who has ADHD as well, but has been raised to take responsibility for his acions).<BR/><BR/>An emotionally disturbed kid pushes other students and is patiently reminded of the rules, due to his disability. He keeps pushing and is given a 5 minute time out after several gentle warnings. He runs away screaming and throws things towards the other children. The other students must be removed for their safety. His parents blame the teacher. He has no consequences at home.<BR/><BR/>Am I teaching any academics? I thought that was my job. Instead I am dealing with behavior.<BR/><BR/>I'm lucky, our supportive principal jumps in to help when needed.<BR/><BR/>It takes my whole weedend to debrief, relax and psych up for Monday.<BR/><BR/>I think of quitting.<BR/><BR/>Oh! I still love the children. I just feel so sad that no one is holding the bar high for them.House Dreamshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15418531563021596315noreply@blogger.com